On The Word Disability

"Part of the problem with the word disabilities is that it immediately suggests an inability to see or hear or walk or do other things that many of us take for granted. But what of people who can't feel? Or talk about their feelings? Or manage their feelings in constructive ways? What of people who aren't able to form close and strong relationships? And people who cannot find fulfillment in their lives, or those who have lost hope, who live in disappointment and bitterness and find in life no joy, no love? These, it seems to me, are the real disabilities." --from The World According To Mr. Rogers: Important Things To Remember, page 25.

There is much discussion about the use of the term "disabled" these days. Some people like the term, some don't. Some use other phrases instead, like "differently-abled". Whatever its weaknesses are, the term is one we hear daily. One of the reasons I like this quote from Fred Rogers is that he points out that disabilities can be hidden from sight. Mine is a cognitive disability. I have two complete arms, two complete legs with feet, I don't walk with a brace or use a wheel chair. By looking at me, no one would know that I am frequently forgetful and struggle with depression. No one would know I have a device in my brain to divert fluid to my abdomen. My forgetfulness keeps me from doing things like working a regular job. When I forget that I'm forgetful I make mistakes that could endanger someone's life if I were working in the medical field as I used to. There are few jobs that don't require us to have a good memory.

Yet, just as Mr. Rogers points out, people all around me could be disabled, too, and I might not know it. Some are not in touch with their feelings. Some feel, but never show their hurt, anger, or fear to anyone, even close friends. Some become so afraid and angry that they pick up a weapon and try to rid the world of the people they are afraid of. Some live unhappily with no real friends. Some have lost hope of ever having a meaningful job and are bitter. These "disabled" folks are all around us, hidden in plain sight.

You might be able to bring tremendous joy to someone today simply by smiling when you see them. When you can, take time to ask, "How are you?" and listen carefully to their answer. The next time a passerby compliments you on your outfit, instead of thinking, Good grief, I don't even know that person... respond out loud with, "Thank you! I like it, too!" No matter what our physical or emotional disability may be, we can brighten others' days. Sometimes that single comment may be the one event in that person's day that prevents him or her from committing murder or suicide. I'm not making this up. It really does happen.

Bring joy to someone else's life today. Make a difference in his or her day. What a gift we have been given to bring joy to others!